


The Smell of Dust after Rain

by lucywho



Category: Yu-Gi-Oh!
Genre: Alcohol, Alternate Universe - Hunger Games Setting, Angst, Another AU nobody asked for, Drug Use, Eating Disorders, Forced Prostitution, How Do I Tag, Kaiba is still kind of an asshole, M/M, Melancholy, Mentions of Suicide, Prostitution of the victors, Skipping Class, Swearing, The Revolution Will Be Televised, This isn't a pretty story, Violence, but forced prostitution is recurring theme, can i write anything except AUs, mentions of cannibalism, non con is not described, this just gets darker and darker
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-08
Updated: 2017-08-27
Packaged: 2018-06-07 06:19:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 8
Words: 8,085
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6789835
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lucywho/pseuds/lucywho
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Of Joey's life as the victor of 68th Annual Hunger Games, how he learnt to understand Kaiba a little better and how rebellion was born.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I am sorry if there are any grammar mistakes, English isn't my first language.

_Ladies and gentlemen I present you the victor of the 68 th Annual Hunger Games JOEY WHEELER!_

"Joey, you got to at least try to sleep normally, at this rate you are going to kill yourself," he hears Tea, District 7’s escort muttering. Yeah sleeping is really easy. It is not like every time he falls asleep he sees himself covered in blood and butchering people. It is okay, he doesn’t think he deserves to sleep anyway.

Maybe his brain is doing it on purpose, so he can finally die.

But he knows he can’t die. It would probably be proclaimed suicide and everybody knows what happens to the families of the victors who resort to that.

He is on a train, on his victory tour. Living is horrible. Breathing hurts. He can’t stand it.

They are on their way to District 3. He killed a boy from there. He is fooling himself that maybe that boy’s family won’t look at him with those teary eyes and wish to see him dead.

Parents of dead tributes usually sit in the front rove when victor is making a speech. It is cruel and reminds him of his place. Just like The Capitol wants.

The visit to District 5 was most horrible one yet. He killed both tributes from there. He felt so many eyes on him. Little girl couldn’t stop crying all the ceremony and asking where is her sister so peacekeepers had to take her away. He tried to intervene but luckily Mai has stopped him. His act could been interpreted as a rebellion and he knows where would that lead him.

He is just lucky he has Mai.

She had won four years earlier by pretending she is dumb as a rock.

She understands.

He asks himself will District 3 understand.

Only living victor in District 3 is Seto Kaiba. Joey is sure in one thing in this world and that is that he can’t stand Seto Kaiba. Seto Kaiba was 17 year old boy when his 12 years old brother was reaped and immediately volunteered. He was, and still is, unusually handsome and he attracted lot of attention. People were fawning over him. Then, when he went into the Arena he tampered with landmines and hid them. He detonated one via controller he made whenever someone was close.

Also, when it came to last three he proved skilled with daggers.

He quickly became most adored victor.

None of that is the reason why Joey can’t stand him.

Joey despises him because he is so mingled with the Capitol. He is their darling. He is there every other month, he constantly changes boyfriends and girlfriends from there, he is constantly on their TV shows and everything.

It is like he became one of them.

And Joey is afraid.

And he hates things he is afraid of.

Only good thing in everything that happened is that Serenity will finally have a decent home to live in. His sister will finally know what it is like to be warm and well fed.

He is still complementing should he try to sleep. He could ask Mai to borrow some of her morphine. She says she only uses that when it becomes too hard. According to that every day is too hard because she takes it almost every day.

But miraculously her mind is still clear enough to hold conversations and to pull him out of the troubles.

Tea is rambling about some random shit again and he pretends he is listening again. It is their routine. Although she is from Capitol and has typical Capitol citizen way of thinking he finds it hard to hate her.

He says good night and retrieves into his room on the train. He decides against the morphine. Nightmares it is.

He doesn’t even take his clothes off. Marik, his stylist, would be so pissed.

The bed is cold. He can’t get used to it. At home he always shared bed with Serenity. And that bed was at least four times smaller. This bed is enormous and he is alone and cold. A perfect summary of everything.

He thinks of home. Of how Serenity looked at him with fear in her lovely eyes when he first came home. He doesn’t blame her, quite contrary, he acknowledges he is a monster and that he should be feared.

Yuugi hugged him. Yuugi also said he is glad to have Joey back. Joey doubts it.

Yami didn’t talk to him and didn’t even spare a glance at him.

Mana died and he came back.

Mana was Yami’s sister and only person he loved beside Yuugi.

If Serenity and Yami went to games and Yami returned, he would felt the same.

He thinks how his mother would feel about everything. It really doesn't matter. She died long time ago due untreated illness. He barely even remembers her.

And how his father is resident drunkard who everybody makes fun off. Well not any more, now he is the father of the victor.

Joey Wheeler isn’t sure if he doesn’t regret winning the Hunger Games.

When he decapitated that boy, no he deserves to be called by name, Tristan he was chanting do it for her and thinking of Serenity. He had to come back to her.

And here he is now, wishing with every cell of his exhausted body that he died in that Arena.

He lied before. There are two things in the world that he is sure of. He can’t stand Seto Kaiba and he hates Capitol with every fiber of his being.

If he could he would burn it all down

And he will still smile tomorrow at the District 3 and shake hands with Kaiba and praise Capitol and its glory. It is not like he can do anything really only imagine. He doesn’t care about his father but he still has a sister to look out for. And he grew attached to Yuugi. How could anyone not love him? And he owes Yami at least that much.

With these thoughts he has fallen into haunted sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am sorry if there are any grammar mistakes, English isn't my first language.

 

 He looks at his hands. Blood. Blood is everywhere. Everything is crimson. His shirt, his pants, the axe he is holding. Everything. His hands. Everything is slippery. He can’t walk. His legs are too heavy. He hears screaming. Sobbing. Please don’t. Make it quick. It suddenly turns into unbearable screeching. He drops the axe and tries to cover his ears. Blood is dripping from his hands. He smudges the blood everywhere. He falls. There is no ground. It doesn’t exist. Just void. Then, just then, he starts to scream.

"Joey, Joey, I am here, please stop," he feels hands embracing him. He opens his eyes. It is Mai. He buries his head in the crook of her neck and starts crying. And for the rest of the night they don’t move.

District 3 looks nice. It looks urban. He can even see a single skyscraper. No trees or plants or nature in sight. Nothing like home. But, again he isn’t really sure if he likes his home anymore. Pathetic.

He changed into another suit. He wrinkled the last one and Tea practically forced him to change. This one in contrast to last one which was stylish green, is white. Oh, the irony.

Then Tea, Mai and him, enter the District 3’s Justice building, which basically looks the same in every district, and the Mayor greets them.

“Congratulations on the winning the Hunger Games.” he shakes Joey’s hand, ”My name is Arthur Hawkins.”

Arthur’s voice is bitter and Joey doesn’t ask questions.

He just switches into his public, cheerful, carefree and even humorous persona. He cracks jokes and makes Arthur’s granddaughter laugh, he talks about the games with pride instead of disgust.

His mask is spotless.

When he is on the stage on central square he tells how it was honour to know their tributes. Bullshit. He even killed the boy from here. He guesses that woman in first row who is crying is his mother. Then he proceeds to talk about the games, because the main purpose of the tour is to remind Districts that they lost their children and that the Capitol is in charge. He just can’t afford not to obey. His is nothing but a puppet on Capitol’s string. Lifeless and hollow.

The dinner that District 3 organizes is modest. They have some delicacies like chocolate pudding, with which he is only familiar because he saw it when he arrived at Capitol that faithful day, but it is nothing compared to Capitol’s meals. He sits on the central place at the table and feels vulnerable and alone. Tea is socializing with Ishizu, District’s 3 escort and Mai went somewhere, probably to increase her doze of morphine. He prefers not to think about it. His eyes wander around and he…

He spots him.

It seems that Seto Kaiba decided to grace the dinner with his presence. He is wearing one of his signature gravity-defying coats with tight black v neck and leather pants. Straight out of the Capitol some might say. Including Joey.

He looks at Joey.

Joey is genuinely surprised. His face looks different without all that Capitol makeup. Especially his eyes. His eyes are still the same arrogant ones, but there is something in them, some depth.

Kaiba flashes him one of his trademarked smirks and goes off to chat with Arthur.

Joey isn’t sure what he expected. Perhaps, a Capitol’s darling, the man who represents things he despises, to offer him a handshake and congratulations?

Maybe he imagined, projected, some depth onto Kaiba’s eyes. Maybe they are just the same and he is the one who is different?

Enough with philosophy. It isn’t important.

In his life, before the Games and everything, there was just one principle. If it’s not going to help you survive and bring food to the table and keep Serenity alive, it is not important. So studying, abstract things like philosophy and art were never important in his short life.

He then kind of starts ignoring everyone, it isn’t like anyone is approaching him and trying to chat about the games anyway, and starts stuffing himself with food.

It’s a habit he gained. He almost starved to death in the Arena and he doesn’t want to ever experience that feeling again.

After some time he feels like throwing up and excuses himself to go to bathroom. He approaches the bathroom doors when he hears someone whispering inside. He leans closer to the doors

"No, he is too good looking and you told me he has someone he cares about. There is no way in hell he will avoid it," he hears a male voice speaking.

"But maybe…” he hears other voice, this time female, speaking.

"There are two courses of action. Either he disobeys, they kill someone he loves and then he obeys in fear that somebody else he loves will get killed or he obeys immediately. There is no inbetween. I warmly recommend the second option,” again the male voice.

“But he is already so wrecked,” he finally recognizes voice as Mai’s.

“His problem not mine,” male voice says and Joey can’t hold the content of his stomach no longer and bursts inside. As his runs to the nearest toilet he passes shocked Mai and… Kaiba.

“It was nice talking to you Valentine” Kaiba murmurs and exits bathroom as Joey is hugging the porcelain goddess aka the toilet and throwing up.

“Oh Joey,” says Mai as she sits down near him.

After he empties his stomach, with Mai’s help he composes himself and exits the bathroom.

“What was that with Kaiba and you” he asks her.

“You will find out soon enough,” is the only answer he gets.

He doesn’t see or hear Kaiba for the rest of the night. He learns that Arthur’s granddaughter is named Rebecca and that she is already working on force fields and holograms and she couldn’t be older than 12.

He also learns that Kaiba is the one who created hologram technology before he went into the Games. With that the night concludes. But that overheard conversetion bugs him.

As he and his team retrieve to the train all he can think is that he will not easily forget that talk in the bathroom.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shit is about to hit the fan. Also I advise you to read the tags carefully. There are some newly added tags and triggers.

 

Visits to Districts 2 and 1 went as uneventful as they could. They are known as famous or rather infamous career Districts. He doesn’t know what he thinks about them to be completely honest. Before the games everything was so clear. Crystal clear. He hates the careers, they kill with no remorse, sadistically and grinning. Their kill counts are as high as the rooftops of Capitol’s prized buildings and they have advantages of being prepared and raised in the Games spirit: it’s not a murder as long as it is in the Games. They amuse Capitol. They have no doubts about their morals and weapons in their hands.

On the other hand you got to admire the fact that that Districts don’t send their children in the Games as the livestock to the slaughterhouse. They at least give them a chance.

Also it would be kind of hypocritical to mindlessly hate them now, regarding his own decisions and his kill count.

Whole world is grey.

Only thing worth mentioning is that he, Joey Wheeler, the winner of the 68th Annual Hunger Games met and even shook hands with Yami Bakura.

Yami Bakura is one of well… most memorable victors. The Arena was desert that year and there was shortage of food near the end of the Games. Long story short is that he didn’t eat for two days straight, went mad and butchered first Tribute he saw and ate him.

After that the Gamemakers desperately tried to get rid of him but with no success. He won.

Even the Capitol people despise him, he is such a rare sight, almost as decent food in District 7.

Why is it that way? Of course cannibalism is horrible on every level. But why is he who decapitated six people seen in better light than Yami Bakura? He is a monster too.

The train is slowly slowing down and his spacious bed is tremoring. He is shaking too, he just doesn’t know is it from the tremors or fear.

They have come to the Capitol. Crown gem in this shitty crown.

He changes into the new suit, quickly, just as Marik showed him. This time it is baby blue. What a silly name for a color.

Chills are passing through his body. Shit is about to hit the fan.

He knows he has to do this alone. No Mai no Tea. He has to exit the train alone. Face the camera flashes alone. Face the enthusiastic Capitol citizens alone. Face the President Dartz alone.

He can do it. He must do it for her.

He opens the wagon door. Flashes greet him. It seems like there are million and one stair from wagon to the ground. He smiles.

Capitol is as grand as he remembers it. Then he reminds himself, only two weeks have passed. People are annoying as he remembers. Two weeks have passed. Smile doesn’t leave his face. They ask him if he is excited for the party tonight. Like fuck he is. But instead of that he says it is as all of his dreams are coming true. More like the nightmares.

This is his life now. Talking bullshit on the Capitol’s top notch train station to the cameras.

Every minute feels like an hour. Hour feels like a day. Day is a year.

The train station is truly beautiful. Everything is pristine white. There are thin TVs on the wall. He never saw them in his district. He forgot how they are called. There is even a statue of president Dartz, also pristine white.

As the crowd starts to dilute he knows where his next stop is. President’s Dartz mansion. He gave special orders for Joey to visit him. He even sent his drivers.

They drive him there in a beautiful white limousine like he is going to a very special event. Well he kind is going to a special event.

He met President briefly, when he was crowned as the victor but he immediately feared him. Dartz appears to be a silly man, but he is central puppet master, a man who runs the Panem, a sadistic bastard.

One wrong move and your whole family is gone. But not you. You have to live with what you have done.

Limousine stops in front of the Mansion gates which automatically open. As soon as he steps out of the limousine two gigantic men appear beside him and they accompany him in through the main door as he is a threat.

But Dartz knows he isn’t a threat. The men are just here to remind him of his place.

Dartz is waiting for him in room as big as his former house. He is sitting on green armchair with the cup of tea looking so mundane as he signals Joey, nonverbally, to sit in the armchair across his.

“So Joey it is nice to finally properly meet you,” Dartz says almost too cheerfully.

“Likewise,” is all Joey manages to muster, already scared shitless.

“Would you like some tea?” Dartz continues with his cheerfulness.

“No, thank you.”

“Joey are you scared of me?”

That question is like taking out the bullet that hit close to the artery. One wrong move and you are essentially dead.

He isn’t sure what Dartz wants him to say.

“I will take your silence as yes. It’s good. You should be.”

He at least ended that torture quickly.

“You must be asking yourself why I called you here,” he looks Joey directly into the eyes “It is not every day that I call people into my mansion. Do you like the Mansion?

“Yes.”

“So back to the reason I called you here. I have a proposition for you,” Dartz says with sinister smile plastered on his face.

Fuck fuck fuck

“I am sure you are aware that you are attractive and extremely popular with my citizens?”

Where is this going?

_"_ _No, he is too good looking and you told me he has someone he cares about. There is no way in hell he will avoid it."_

But what does it mean?

“To cut the story short I have few people who would like to spend the night with you,” he continues.

What the fuck?

Does he mean…Sex?

“Yeah that is euphemism for having sex,” Dartz says, almost like he is reading Joey’s mind and chuckles.

PRESIDENT DARTZ IS ASKING HIM TO BECOME A PROSTITUTE? He hadn’t even had his first kiss yet. He can’t do this. No he can’t.

“Virgins,” Dartz mutters.

No, here is where he draws a line. He won’t have sex with Capitol citizens. He isn’t Kaiba.

NO NO NO

“So what’s your answer to my proposition Joey?”

_"_ _There is two courses of action. Either he disobeys, they kill someone he likes and then he obeys in fear that somebody else he loves might get killed or he obeys immediately. There is no between. I warmly recommend the second option.”_

NO

Mai

NO

Yami

NO

Yuugi

NO

Serenity

“I agree,” he whispers.


	4. Chapter 4

“I always knew you are a reasonable man Joey Wheeler,” Dartz’s voice mocks him.“They will pick you up after the party tonight.”

This cannot be happening. This is just a nightmare. Soon he will wake up in his luxurious and cold bed.

“I am afraid I don’t have any time left for today Joey so you will have to excuse yourself now.”

Except it isn’t. It is cold and harsh world. Real world. Fucked up to it's core.

As he slowly frees himself from the hug of the armchair and same two gigantic men who accompanied him to the mansion appear at his sides.

“Oh and please remember not to disobey, I would absolutely hate to do something to your cute little sister. Serenity isn’t it?”

Every inch of the Joey, every cell and fibre of his being is screaming to beat the crap out of the president Dartz. Old Joey, who practically raised himself and his sister, who was used to punching his way through the problems would do just that. But new Joey is the shell of the man who he used to be.

“Yes.”

He stretches his hand and does a proper handshake with President Dartz.

“So Joey goodbye.”  
“Goodbye.”

He doesn’t know how he manged to walk up to the limousine. A small shadow of his past personality doesn’t let him cry in the limousine. It doesn’t let him cry not even when he exits it and goes to the building to which Mai and Tea and his team moved from the train.

Mai sees him first and immediately knows.  She drags him away under excuse that they need to gossip; that she needs to tell him all the juicy details about the party. Everybody eats that shit up. Everything is blurry from the uncried tears and he doesn’t know how they even ended up on the corner of the rooftop. But he understands why rooftop; only place in the building without cameras.

She hugs him. He cries. She tells him it is going to be alright. He doesn’t believe her. They stand like that, like two idiots for it feels like the eternity.

Then anger kicks in.

“Wait a moment, you know about this?” he removes her arms from his shoulders and steps back.

“Joey…I…”

“You could have told me.”

“And that wouldn’t change anything.”

“YOU COULD HAVE TOLD ME!” he screams at her.

“AND YOU WOULD DO WHAT? TELL ME, EXACTLY HOW ME TELLING YOU WOULD HELP?”

He is silent.

“I AM WAITING FOR THE ANSWER JOEY WHEELER!”

“You could have told me before I went into the games, then I would have known I shouldn’t win. You could have told me that I would be reduce to the fucking Capitol puppet. You could have told me about the fucking nightmares. About the shitty life of the victor.”

Tears start to stream down the Mai’s face.

“I AM SELFISH JOEY. HAVEN’T YOU REALIZED THAT YET? I DIDN’T TELL YOU BECAUSE I DIDN’T WANT TO BE FUCKING ALONE ANYMORE. YOU THINK ANY MENTORS TELL THEIR TRIBUTES THAT? OF COURSE THE ANSWER IS BIG FAT FUCKING NO. BECAUSE WE ARE ALL ALONE AND NOBODY CARED ENOUGH TO TELL US. IF WE WERE GOING AROUND TELLING THAT FIRST CAPITOL WOULD PUNISH US SEVERLY, SECOND WE WOULD BE ALL ALONE SURROUNDED BY CAREERS. HATE TO BREAK IT TO YOU BUT YOU HAVE TO BE SELFISH TO WIN THE HUNGER GAMES. YOU HAVE TO BE A DISGUSTING PEARSON BECAUSE ALL GOOD PEOPLE DIE IN THE GAMES!”

She left.

Joey knew he should care but he just can’t.

He truly is disgusting person.

It is all true.

“Joey?” he hears a voice. “Is everything ok? We heard yelling? Don’t worry we didn’t actually understood anything.”

It is Marik.

Joey doesn’t respond.

“Ok I will tell Tea not to throw a fit.”

Joey sits on the rooftop floor.

He doesn’t know what he thinks about the Marik. He seems to switch between being caring to being murderous way to often for Joey’s liking. It is hypocritical, really. He also saw he, a couple of times before his games, hanging out with Yami Bakura. He remembers being particularly pissed off by that. He taught that Marik was giving information out to the enemy. He now knows better.

So he is sitting on the rooftop. Thinking about his relationship with Marik. Great.

Time passes. Clouds on the sky move. He is called to get ready for the party.

Dartz sent new tux for him. He thinks he is going to throw up.

Mai is nowhere to be found and he doesn’t care. He has his own worries.

Limousine drives Tea and him to the party.

It is a long ride indeed.

As soon as Tea and he step out of the limousine, they are surrounded by the people. They follow them as they step into the grand complex where the party is held. It is beautiful, floor is glass, tables are glass, food is everywhere. But he knows he can’t enjoy this.

He gets separated from the Tea early on and dragged around to dance or chitchat.

And  now he is listening to extremely boring woman who is somehow related to the one of the Game Makers. His eyes are wandering around the rooms when he sees him. Seto Kaiba.

Kaiba looks astonishing. He is wearing a beautiful sleeveless white trench coat which, like all he wears, defies gravity. Other than that he is all in black leather which highlights his perfect body. To be honest he doesn’t look all that different than usual, perhaps Joey has changed.

But his eyes are dead. Completely. He smirks, but he is dead. He dances, he teases, he amazes everybody with his intelligence but make no mistake. Those are the eyes of the dead man. Joey has seen them, on his mother, on the tributes in the arena.

He excuses himself and goes to grab some food to overstuff himself again when he hears the voice.

“I wouldn’t do that if I wear you mutt.”

It is fucking Kaiba.

He is thinking of throwing a plate at him.

But then Kaiba, almighty Seto Kaiba, the prince of Capitol whispers without any venom present in his voice;

“Meet me at the toilet.”


	5. Chapter 5

“Why?”

“You really are idiot, ”Kaiba smirks and his voice instantly becomes itself again  “aren’t you?”

He doesn’t punch him. He is proud of himself.

“Yeah and meet me at the toilet is extremely common thing to say to someone-”

“Listen, we don’t have time for this bullshit right now. I will leave now and you will meet me in five minutes.”

He leans close, too close, and whispers; “They are watching us.”

He turns around and starts walking and out of nowhere hisses, loudly so everyone can hear him “Wheeler you little bitch.”

Now everybody stares at him.

And now Joey is really furious.

But Kaiba, that bastard, turns his head around and shots him killer look and after that he exits the grand ballroom.

He decides to wait. Nobody approaches him, they must fear angering Kaiba. Good. Capitol people still fear of something.  Good to know.

Five minutes passes and he exits the ballroom and enters the luxurious toilet room where the Kaiba is waiting.

Kaiba is facing him. His hands are leaning on the sink. Under the direct toilet room light you can see how tired he really looks.

“What was that display?” Joey asks him angrily and slams the door shut.

“Why I must work with somebody so simple minded,” bastard sighs ” it was so you have excuse to come after me.”

“Like they don’t have cameras here.”

“You are forgetting who you are talking to.”

“What is that supposed to mean?” he sits down on the tiled floor. Like hell he cares about the suit.

The bastard’s expression changes into something unreadable.

“We don’t have time for this crap. I am here to say: blow the shit up tonight.”

“What?”

“Man who paid for you-“

“Man?” he swallows the lump down his throat. He at least hoped for a lady.

“We need him. He is one of game makers. Little slow but brilliant in creating bloody traps for the children. Don’t make him your regular.” Kaiba says distantly.

“I don’t understand,” is all Joey says.

“Should I draw it for you mutt? Be good so Dartz doesn’t suspect anything but not too good so he doesn’t request for you again-“

“You mean in bed?” Joey musters sadly “Don’t worry about it he won’t request me again.”

“Virgin?” something that looks like sadness briefly flickers in his eyes but just for a second.  After that only thing you can see in them is pure apathy. But god they really are astonishing. He was so close to him. He stared directly into his eyes. They are colour of the sky after the storm and-

Get it together Joey. You hate him. You are about to get violated. You have more important things on your mind.

 “Why do you need him?” he asks to clear his mind.

“I was asked not to inform you of that,” he removes his hands from the sink.

“So this whole thing is a game of keeping the Joey in dark.”

“I honestly couldn’t care less. I need to punch you know.”

“Yeah Joey trust us-wait, what?”

“Is a tiny mutt scared of a little punch?”

“What the fuck you can’t just tell people that. Why?”

“It needs to look like we were fighting. I implanted recording made with holograms of us fighting into camera.”

He doesn’t understand what Kaiba just said. And he doesn’t care.

“Why can’t I punch you, you bastard?” He stands up.

“Because I am Seto Kaiba.”

And fist flies into his face. Right in his eye. It hurts like a bitch. Kaiba is a son of a bitch. He can’t even open it. He prepares to launch his fist into Kaiba’s face when he realises he exited the toilet room already. Coward.

He washes his face and somehow manages to open his poor abused eye.  He opens the toilet room door and he sees none other than Yami Bakura leaned on the opposite wall.  He is grinning madly.

“He really knows how to hit.  He doesn’t look like it at all. You wouldn’t even think he knows how to do that. His style of fighting is calculating all the solutions and outsmarting the opponent. ”

He isn’t really up to listening the maniac. He lets that show on his face. But maniac continues anyway.

“You know what is real pity? He is overlooking the key factor.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Nothing. At least to you.”

“Then why are you telling me that?” it finally gets to his head that he is standing at the toilet doorframe like an idiot so he moves and closes the doors.

Nothing. Yami Bakura says nothing. Instead of saying something he just walks away.

And then, in that moment when he is all alone, it hits him. Horrible reality.  He tried to distance himself from it, he tried not to think about it, to push it in the furthest corner of his mind. But it was bound to hit him. He glances at the wristwatch.

Wristwatch was his grandfather and the rare part of him that survived the Arena.

It is eleven o’clock. He guesses that party will start to die down at two-three in the morning. So he still has time.

He desperately needs someone. Someone. Serenity. Why didn’t he let Marik or Tea to get him mobile phone?

Maybe he should ask someone to borrow him theirs. He is a victor and this is his party. Yeah he wasn’t attending it for the past half an hour but it is his.

She is probably sleeping. He would hate to wake her up.

Mai. No. She is lying bitch.

Who else he could call? Only other person that comes to his mind ia Yugi. But he is certain that he must started to hate him at least a little bit now after all the pain he caused Yami-

He re-enters the ballroom. Party is full blown. Loud music is screeching. Flock of Capitol women surround him immediately. He grabs the random one to dance with him.

So he is suffering alone. Good. That’s how it is supposed to be.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am back to writing this mess.  
> Thank you all for the comments. If I didn't reply it is probably because I didn't know what to say. You are all wonderful :)

_“Daddy, daddy, look what I have found.” A bubbly young girl said with excitement in her eyes and smile on her lips._

_“Left it were you found it Mai,” replied the taller figure._

_Mai’s eyes lowered at the little chick she was holding. It nestled in warmth of her hands. At first glance it appeared that the chick is completely fine. But upon closer inspection one could see that its wing is in wrong position._

_“But daddy I think its wing is broken,” she whispered. Chicks’ fate was clear. “If I left it, it is going to die.”_

_“Mai I won’t repeat myself. Let the nature do its job. If it isn’t strong enough to survive it doesn’t deserve survival,” stern voice echoed._

_It was perhaps the most crucial point in her young life. She looked him straight into the eyes._

_“No.”_

 

It was horrible day to be Mai Valentine. Well, scratch that, it was horrible to be Mai Valentine every day. It was common knowledge by now.

Her eyelids felt heavy. Urge to vomit kidnapped rest of her sleep but her eyes just didn’t want to open.

“I hope you are happy with yourself.”

Whose voice it is?

“Marik? Is it you? Where am I?”

“You are in my train wagon.” Marik, now she was sure, answered.

Her eyes snapped open. Oh shit. There he  was  sitting. On the edge of the bed she was laying in. In which someone tucked her in. It doesn’t feel right. Her last memory was…

“Did I miss it?”

“Yeah,” it is only thing he says.

Fuck Dartz is going to kill her. Joey-. No.

Bed was fairly large and it had tacky purple sheets. She looked around. Everything else was plain. White. Without the touch of personality. White wardrobe. White nightstand. So not Marik. Marik was all… Colours.

“It looks different then your last room,” she sighed. Urge to vomit was getting stronger and stronger.

“No shit.”

“So how did I get here?”

“He phoned me, sometime around three in the morning. He said you are sleeping on the bench in front of the Training center,” she noticed he was quite angry.

Yeah. It must have been bad if he called. Yami Bakura. Marik on and off secret boyfriend. Best kept secret in whole Capitol. Even Dartz didn’t know. Mostly likely because he didn’t particularly care about either of them. But Marik hated when he called directly. You never know if your phone is under surveillance. You never know if you are under surveillance. And relationships are dangerous. They can be used against you. Dartz would gladly get his greedy hands on something which is so precious in this wretched world. No wonder Marik was pissed.

“So…”

“I picked you up.”

“How is…”

“He got back around same time I brought you here. He locked himself in the room and he refuses to get out.”

So that is how that went.

“I… I think I need to throw up.”

She threw the cover off herself and got up. Her shaky legs were barely holding her up.

“Do you need-“

“No.” she cut him.  She deserves this. It is her own fault.

She should get used to it by now anyway. She knows every side effect. She knows fatigue, memory loss, vomiting. She knows that she has to put extra make up on her fingertips and lips. She knows it too well. But, it is worthy sacrifice, just to let go.

Marik’s bathroom was plain and utterly unimpressive. As she kneeled in front of toilet, Joey crossed her mind again. If she wants to be honest to herself, his reaction was perfectly normal. She did the exact same thing after. After those hands touched her. After… No. It is over. Her time had passed. She was lucky in the end. People weren’t interested in her so much and they didn’t actively sought after her all the time. And then… Seto Kaiba won.  It was an explosion. People went crazy. And she was thankfully forgotten.

One got to admire him, he cheated the system with landmines. And of course he paid for it. Everybody pays in the end.

She throws up. And just sits down. Here stomach is rumbling. There is no way in hell she is getting out of this bathroom in this condition. She tries to shift her thoughts elsewhere.

They even mocked him by putting his own creation, almost lifelike holograms, in the Arena.

Mai just wonders how Seto Kaiba hasn’t gone mad already. Maybe he did. Maybe he is just better at hiding it than her.  She was never good at Hide and seek. They are… something. Not friends, but more than acquaintances.  She doesn’t like him and she is pretty sure that he doesn’t like her. But he is there to talk to sometimes and that is enough. He was here before Joey was and she is somehow grateful to him for taking her spot.

Burning question is, how did she get to the bench in front of the training center? Last thing she remembers is retreating back to her wagon after the fight with Joey. And snorting some. That’s about it. Everything else is a blank space. Nothing. Not a single thing drips back into her fog of a memory. It is not usually like that. Yeah memory loss is pretty common but she at least remembers tiny bits. This was strange.

Suddenly bathroom door opens. It is Marik.

“He opened the door of his room and wants to talk to you.”


	7. Chapter 7

He overslept. Again. Fuck. They are going to call Seto. Again. Even bigger fuck.

He could actually make it to the last class. After some thinking, he decides against it. They are going to call Seto either way.

It isn’t that Mokuba Kaiba is really lazy, he just doesn’t care about school. He just goes because of Seto.

He wiggles out of the covers and stretches. Time to eat something. While going downstairs thought pops into his mind. Maybe he should have changed from pyjama into something more presentable. You know, in case school sends someone. Wouldn’t be the first time.

Nah, if it is good for sleeping in, it is good for whoever the school sends. If they send someone, that is.

Kitchen is mess. Dirty dishes everywhere. He should clean it before Seto comes home. But he doesn’t know when is Seto coming home. He never knows.

He opts out for some milk and Capitol cereals. Fuck Capitol and their delicious cereal. Burn it and leave only cereal factory.

 He searches the kitchen cabinets for the bowl and he can’t find any clean one. That’s it. He is going to clean this shithole. And maybe if Seto comes back soon he will be all like “Good job Mokuba, I don’t care you skip school”. And he will just hug Seto and tell him he loves him.

Not all I miss you so much bullshit. He knows Seto would take down the moon if that meant he would spend more time with him. Seto is doing all he can to keep him safe. He can’t be here with him because he is forced to entertain some sick Capitol fucker. And probably to sleep with said sick Capitol fucker.

He wishes that he can say he realized immediately what was happening at those Capitol parties. But alas, Seto told him himself. He got drunk out of his mind last year on anniversary of Kisara’s death. And spilled everything.

Mokuba seriously thought about ending his life. If he was dead, they wouldn’t have anything over Seto. But he ending his life would render everything Seto did in and out of the game meaningless and pointless. He couldn’t do that.

After Seto woke up with slight hangover, he didn’t remember. They just continued their lives.

So here he is now. Living while knowing that his very existence brings pain to the person he loves the most.

He starts with washing the pile of dishes right in the sink.

He hopes that this year’s winner Joey Wheeler will take the cursed spotlight. Previous two winners Mako and Weevil haven’t managed that. Their games were quite boring. Weevil hide for most of the time and in the end he was only one that managed to outrun the swarm of poison bugs. Mako won because he was good at swimming. But Wheeler was good looking and wild. He isn’t someone you would want to be seen in public with but someone you would like to bed. He has charming smile and he cracks a lot of jokes and generally tries to be likeable but in the end he is nothing more than a sexy savage to Capitol.

Mokuba just hopes that sexy savage trend will replace handsome genius trend in Capitol.

Maybe then he will be able to live with himself.

The doorbell is ringing. So school decided to send someone after all. He closes the tap and goes to open the big wooden door.

And at the door is no other than Leon von Schroeder.

“I just brought you homework.” Leon mutters.

“School is over already?” he genuinely asks.

“Yeah, it is already two o’clock.” Leon desperately tries to avoid his gaze.

It is no secret that Leon’s older brother Zigfried despises Seto. He often says that Seto is a sellout and that he belongs among the Capitol people.

In Mokuba’s eyes, if somebody belongs among Capitol people, it is Sigfried with his ridiculous long purple hair. And even Leon has it.

“Anything interesting happened?”

“Nah. I will come to pick this up in five.” Leon answers and hands him the notebooks. It is clear that he is only here because the teacher told him to come.

Mokuba’s phone starts ringing.

“Bye.” Leon leaves before young Kaiba managed to say something.

He closes the door and looks at callers ID.

It is Seto. He picks up.

“HI SETO I AM SORRY SCHOOL CALLED YOU I DIDN’T MEAN TO SKIP I JUST OVERSLEPT,” he shouts incredibly fast.

“Wow Mokie calm down-“

“Don’t call me Mokie I am not five.” Mokupa growls.

“No school called me but care to elaborate on that skipping or how you call it oversleeping thing?”

“I swear Seto it was accident this time.”

“No more accidents in the future. Got it?” there was some playfulness in voice. It got Mokuba excited. Maybe Capitol really doesn’t care about Seto anymore. Maybe he will soon come home.

“Yeah. I got it.”

“Is there anything new?” Seto asked.

“Nah, nothing really.” He again knows better than ask Seto if there is anything new in return. Like Seto could actually tell him. Like their phones weren’t all bugged by Capitol bastards.

“Listen,” Seto suddenly started to sound serious and a little sad “the real reason I called is that it looks like I won’t be home for long time. I will send you money and you should definitely go and buy food. You can’t live just off cereals. I know, don’t lie to me, that you only live off that and milk. I swear I will stop buying that shit.”

Seto tries to finish on happy note, but Mokuba still feels a pang of sadness in his stomach.

“Should I send someone to clean the place?”

“I started to clean it just today.”

“Oh ok. I gotta go Mokie. I love you. Bye.”

“I love you too. Bye.”

Tears start to stream down his face. Alone. In this big house. In the victor’s village.


	8. Chapter 8

“Mai I…” he starts but he can’t finish.

She hugs him. Tears start to stream down his face. He mourns losing the last pieces of his innocence and childhood.

She cries, too.

They stay like that for it feels like eternity, not saying a word.

“Why are we in train wagon?” he finally pulls away.

“I don’t really know,” she offers him a sad smile.

“Tea and me didn’t judge either of you presentable enough for fancy hotel,” Marik answers from the doorframe. That’s code for you would probably cause incident.

“When did you come here?” Joey asks.

“Ehh… Unimportant. By the way you really should head for the hotel. Tea will send car for you. You should also change. Both of you stink.” Marik turns away and exits.

 They do as he says in complete silence. She doesn’t push him and he is grateful. She asks no questions.  Car ride passes uneventful and they go separate ways in hotel.

First thing he does is grabbing an alcohol bottle from cabinet in the room. He smiles when he sees that cabinet is well supplied with alcohol and drugs. They know what they are dealing with. He heads for the rooftop.

He is going to get drunk. To be completely honest right know he will do anything to forget that hands on him.

_“I will never ever drink.”_

He promised Serenity. Elevator takes him to the highest floor. He promised himself. He climbs the stairs to the rooftop. He feels so numb. 

“Oh ok. I gotta go Mokie. I love you. Bye.”

He sees figure in black turtleneck and black leather pants. Figure turns around and Joey realizes he doesn’t really recognize Kaiba without his gravity defying coats.

There are tears in his eyes.

He blinks quickly and they are there no more.

And then Joey realizes the fundamental truth.

“I understand,” Joey whispers.

Kaiba turns angry rather quickly.

 “So poor little Joey Wheeler finally realized that he isn’t so special. We all have someone we need to protect. We are all sluts here,” he spits venomously.

Joey walks to him and offers him the bottle. Kaiba chugs it. He goes and sits on the edge. He stares the sky. Joey follows.

“Don’t you dare to look down on me mutt.”

Well they are in exact same situation, so that would be pretty hypocritical of him.  He was really an idiot for not realizing it sooner.

Kaiba passes him the bottle. He drinks.

“I saw your brother on TV couple of times. He was adorable.”

Bottle changes hands again.

“He still is. He has grown up but he still has that mare of wild raven hair. I wish he would cut it,” he lights up a bit “everything I do I do for him. ”

He now looks at Joey.

“You have a sister, right? I stopped watching your games after my tributes died.”

He forgot that Kaiba was mentor to kids from third district.

“Serenity is light of my life. I couldn’t live with myself if something happened to her.”

“Well mutt looks like we have some things in common.”

Kaiba runs his hand through his beautiful brown hair.

“HEY! I thought we had a bonding moment.”

Kaiba smirks.

Joey drinks.

“In your head mutt.”

“Why do you call me mutt anyways?” Joey asks.

“Your hair reminds me a stray dog Mokuba and I have found once. It was full of fleas and waged his tail too much.”

“It meant he was happy.”

Kaiba looked at him like he offended him gravely. His eyes are so beautiful and vulnerable.

“I am not dumb. I know what it meant.”

That was a funny thought. Possibility that anyone would think Kaiba is dumb.

“And what happened to the dog?”

“Nothing.  We left him where we found it. I am pretty sure that he would have been pissed if we brought an animal back. I know Mokuba kept leaving the filled up food bowl where we found  it.” He took up a long sip from an almost empty bottle.

“Who is he?”  Joey boldly asks.

“That’s none of your damn business,” Kaiba said.

So this is real Kaiba. Not some wannabe be Capitol citizen with perfect carefree life. He was real and broken human being. Just like him.

“Ok no need to get pissed again.  I don’t see any reason to get so worked up over a simply question. Just say you don’t want to talk about it.“

Silence.

“You are an interesting man Joey Wheeler.”

“Uhhh…Thanks?”

“You should be thankful. It is not often that I honestly say something nice to someone.”

So that was a compliment.

Then Kaiba nervously looks around. He leans and whispers in Joey’s ear : “ You can trust Noah, the green haired boy. He is an ally. Ask him about blue eyes white dragon.”

Kaiba pulls away and his whole demeanor changes. He winks.

Damn. They probably have cameras even here. Not many people could pull I probably whispered something really sexy in your ear. Well Kaiba wasn’t most of people.

Than he got up and walked away leaving Joey with empty alcohol bottle.

And Joey realized that he for the moment forgot about last night.


End file.
